Shhh.....

I'm wondering why
thinking of those happy times with you
brings me tears.
And I'm wondering why
thinking of those times we argued
brings me laughters.

I'm not posting in this blog probably ever again. All the posts here really forms a significant part of my life. Its something that worth me keeping in my memory forever. Read it if u wish. I'm truely sorry is anything here makes u uncomfortable. Click on the link at the top left hand corner for my current blog. =))

Thursday, August 10, 2006
7:23 PM

I'm really such an idiot who lost my confidence.. thats the silliest thing a guy can be..

Realised i lost track of my own soul recently.
Been churned and messed up in this world by this world.
Forgotten my aims, neglected my purposes.
What made me realised: me getting all worked up over small things.
Back to basics,
return to me.
Back to where
I wanna be.
Some say I do reckless things, some say I dont work hard enough.
I guess whatever you say is based on whatever you judged upon,
and certainly your kind of criteria dont work for me.
I cant stop anyone from judging me or anything, and i wont.
You are who you are, no matter how you choose your own life.
Let me choose mine.
I do try to listen and change, for the better,
while still remaining me.
But if i listen to all of your every complains and dissatisfaction with me.
make the "neccessary" changes, to be a "better man"
I would have long be perfect.
That's no where i wanna be.
Im imperfect.

Living in my world, my rules.
Thinking for you, i try my best.
Giving my all everyday.
Gonna stand tall,
gotta be free.
Just that the wild ocean whale that lives in me.
There are times when i need thee,
but there are times that you aint there.
Not to blame,
blame to Life.
There are times that i need peace,
but time and time,
peace lies far.
Savouring wine in a finely tuned glass,
I living my life laughing at hyennas,
crying like shores,
thinking like the wise sage,
but acting like a fool.
Realised,
all i need is none.
Transient,
Life is.
Understand,
humans cant.
Accept me,
as imperfect.

Life never stops for me to cry,
so I'm moving on.